Smart, Successful, and Impatient: The Paradox of Ambiguity Intolerance

Is this you?

• You prefer clear-cut answers

• When possible, you want to predict outcomes

• When faced with ambiguity, you feel anxious and impatient

In the realm of success, intelligence and speed are often hailed as cornerstone attributes. Yet, a lesser-known paradox lies beneath the surface: many smart, fast-moving, and successful individuals struggle with an intolerance for ambiguity.  For many high-achievers, this can be a significant hurdle. This intolerance can manifest as impatience, premature judgments, and hasty conclusions, particularly in situations that demand safety for all styles, deliberation, and collaboration.

Ambiguity refers to situations where information is incomplete, uncertain, or open to multiple interpretations. For some, this uncertainty can trigger feelings of discomfort, stress, and a desire to seek immediate clarity.  

In the workplace, ambiguity intolerance can have detrimental consequences. Situations that require thoughtful consideration, such as problem-solving, decision-making, and collaboration, can be hampered by:

• Rushing to Conclusions: Impatience can lead to premature assumptions and biased interpretations. You may overlook important details or rush to conclusions based on limited information.

• Missing Information & Perspectives:  When you are impatient, you probably cut off others before they have fully expressed their opinions. You might do this mentally or in action. This can prevent valuable insights from being shared and lead to a lack of consensus.

• Decision-Making Errors: Hasty decisions made under conditions of ambiguity can result in poor outcomes. Without adequate contemplation and consideration of alternatives, you will make choices that are not aligned with the best long-term interests and outcomes.

Increasing Your Ambiguity Tolerance

1. Practice Staying Present:   Being grounded in the present (vs. allowing your mind to focus on the past or future) can help you become more aware of your thoughts and feelings. By observing your reactions to ambiguity, you can develop more tolerance and patience.

   
   

2. Seek Information: Adopt a growth or learner mindset.  Be Curious.  Instead of jumping to conclusions and believing you know the answer straight away, gather more information and explore different perspectives. This can help reduce uncertainty and improve decision-making.

   
   

3. Foster Collaboration: Create an environment where people at work or in your home feel comfortable sharing their opinions and exploring ideas together.  Establish ground rules for open dialogue and make it safe for people to disagree, have divergent voice points, etc.  Collaboration can help broaden perspectives and reduce the pressure to find quick answers.

Navigating the intricacies of success requires more than just intelligence and speed; it demands the ability to handle ambiguity gracefully. Recognizing and addressing your discomfort with uncertainty is crucial for personal growth and effective collaboration. By cultivating patience, fostering open-mindedness, and allowing space for diverse perspectives, you can transform ambiguity from a source of stress into an opportunity for higher trust and psychological safety in your team and family, and create an environment for new agreements and even innovation.